Wednesday, June 07, 2006

How Are You?

That was the first thing P said to me when I called and it made all the difference. There I was 19 and pregnant, living with my on again, off again boyfriend and knowing in my heart that I would give my child up for adoption. I was only 10 weeks along but I wanted to start the search. I had remembered seeing ads by prospective adoptive parents in USA Today during social studies classes when we were using the newspapers for class assignments. So I bought a paper and called a few of the numbers. I had been mulling over in my mind the types of things I wanted for my child besides a father. I wanted my baby to have a large extended family and to grow up going to church. It was also important that my baby live in a certain area of the country that I was familiar with and that the mom plan to stay home for at least a little while. So I asked the people I called about their families, their religion, their location and childcare plans. One woman upon hearing how early I was in m pregnancy was not very warm at all, was particularly uncomfortable with the religion questions, and kept referring me to her attorney. But then I called P (of M&P) and rather than immediately asking me how far along I was or anything else about the pregnancy, he asked about me. He asked, "How are you?". That made all the difference. As I talked with him and then M, I felt really comfortable. They asked me to call their attorney also, which I did the next day. We had several more conversations and then agreed to meet for lunch. They were a wonderful couple and I remember that I was touched when I saw them kiss briefly but affectionately after the lunch as one went back to work and the other walked a couple of blocks with me. They'd been married 15 years and been through a lot together and yet still took the time to be genuinely affectionate with one another. I took this as a good sign for my baby - that their home would be one of love.


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