Saturday, April 14, 2012

Almost 21

My son turns 21 in June. I grew some balls and emailed his adoptive mother. I knew her last name and have known about her Web site and email for a while, so I went ahead and used it.

We'll see if she emails back.

Basically, I am tired of this waiting thing. Should I just throw the towel in and call it a day? Okay, fine, he doesn't want any contact. But you know, the thing that bothers me is I still want to know what he was like as a child. I missed out on all of that. So I emailed her.

We'll see if I hear anything.

3 Comments:

Blogger Linda said...

I don't know your entire story, but I am very curious as to why you would contact his adoptive Mom.

He's been a legal adult for years now. I know personally for me, and most adoptees I know, we want our a Moms to stay as far away from our reunions as possible. They tend to get, well....errr...ummmm...even worse.

10:59 AM  
Blogger Linda said...

I don;t know your entire story, but I am very curious as to why you would contact his adoptive Mom.

He's been a legal adult for years now. I know personally for me, and most adoptees I know, we want our a Moms to stay as far away from our reunions as possible. They tend to get, well....errr...ummmm...even worse.

11:00 AM  
Blogger Jayne said...

Hi Linda. Thanks for your comment. I hadn't thought about his not wanting to involve his adoptive mother. I was trying to be respectful, especially since my relationship with them started with her and I thought it might be nice if we all could be an extended family of sorts. Yeah, I guess that is a fantasy. While it wasn't an open adoption in the true sense, he should have enough of my contact information to contact me if he wanted to, and he told his amom that he wasn't interested.

I am glad he has grown up in a good family and if he doesn't want contact, there's not much I can do. However, I really regret not having known him at all as a child. I was led to believe that since they would be open about his adoption, that there would be the possibility of contact during his childhood. I am curious about the type of child he was, funny stuff, etc. that any family would normally be happy to share with other people but that doesn't quite come across in a handful of annual letters and very few pictures.

Shame on me for being so gullible.

9:48 PM  

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